7/15/2011

I've debated posting this, as I have chosen to continue to cheer for now. But I'm still having a hard time with whether or not it's the right decision for me...


The last week has been hard. As I have been faced with a big decision in my life at this time.

I am no longer sure that participating in cheer will be the path I take next season. And that's hard for me.

As I sat crying with my best friend this week about what decision is right. I was in a lot of ways reminded of the feelings I felt 3 years ago. And I know that if I chose to no longer cheer, that I will experience a loss, and it will be hard. 

But there have been a few things I have thought about, and realized this week

1. I will be okay, if I choose to take my life in a different direction. Although I will be loosing something important in my life, I have been through far worse loss, and I can overcome anything that is thrown at me.

2. Whether I choose to end my cheer career this year, or next year eventually it's going to end. And at that time I will be taking off my training wheels in some sense. Cheer was my escape, and a huge reason why I was able to move on and handle placement. But I have also made cheer one of my main focuses, and haven't learned how to fully live since placement. I have used cheer as a way to hold back figuring out how to live my life again. 

3. What is meant to be will be. I know the right decision will come. The right decisions always come. Will it be easy? No, not at all! Either decision will have it's on obstacles and struggles for me. But will it be right?   Of course. 

I just wish I knew what the right answer was.