I can't believe it.

I look back over the last year and think wow.
How did I survive?
Some days I feel like I am barely surviving.

Cheer has ended for the season.
Undefeated in AZ.
With two national titles.
I don't think we could have asked for a better season, after all the ups and downs my team has had. (people quitting at the beginning of the season, fire at the gym, stolen stereo system.. etc..)We pulled it together.

This next year will mark change in my life.
New gym for cheer.
New home.
License.
and so much more.

If only I can keep my head off the ground, I will come to find out there is good that comes of all situations.

Friday = Wedding
Next weekend = Moving

Eyes opening

Today a friend told me really how much she cared.
She was there when I bawled my eyes out night after night last semester
She was there to make me laugh, and pull me up when I didn't feel like doing anything
When I would get calls, and voice mails that made me feel so low, so guilty, so sad.
She was always there.
Last semester was so hard for me.
I didn't feel like I had a life, and mostly I just wanted to stay in bed and bawl my eyes out
I was sad, I was hurt, and friend wise I felt alone.
She was there to take me out for a drive
Listen to me complain about the things that were bring me down
Listen to me talk about Lily's family for the longest time
She was there the first day I went back to school
Sometimes I forget how much others care about me.
I feel soo alone, so depressed.
But maybe I just need to open up my eyes..

Openness and Milestones

aabm #4: openness and milestones

Mommy.

So I got a request about the story of my Mom, and technically that's actually something I have been thinking about sharing, just haven't found the right words.

A bracelet I bought a school to benefit Relay For life.

When I was about three my Mom found out she had Melanoma.
I don't remember much about that day they told us Mom was sick, I was young, everyone was upset and I just wanted to sleep with my mom and dad that night. However I was even more upset when I couldn't.
She went through Chemotherapy, lost her hair, and wore a wig.
She was so small a petite anyways, she just looked real small.
She had seizures in the middle of the night.
I distinctly remember hospital visits, where I would hide from nurse because they scared me.
She was a stay at home mom and took care of me during the day. But when she got too bad, I spent days with this lady from the church or that one. They always tried to make me feel at home making me peanut butter sandwiches because I didn't like peanut butter and jelly, or letting me borrow fun toys I liked.
Once I remember my mom being home along and we brought her food for lunch; She had already made lunch but had burned herself doing so.
I spent one day crying telling her how I didn't want to die. She told me she didn't want to die either. She wiped away my tears, and made me laugh telling me my tears tasted salty.
We went to Disneyland where I was bummed because I wasn't tall enough to ride Indiana Jones. We drove around LA while my dad showed us where he served a mission. About a week long vacation that became our last.
She continuously got worse. There was nothing they could do anymore. And after numerous nights where my father couldn't sleep because he stayed up watching her making sure she wasn't having a seizure that she was ok. When she could no longer stay at home, she went to the Hospice.
How much I disliked that place.
I spent most of our time there outside on the playground.
One day a lady wasn't paying attention and was talking out loud in front of my sister and I about how this "was a place where they brought people to die"
How painful and harsh those words were.
And after a painful fight with cancer, we lost.
Conference weekend April 5Th, 1997.
We went down to the hospice and watched conference with my mom.
My mom who was no longer there.
My mom who had 6 kids ranging from 4-20.
My mom who had always made my days.
Let me try her V8 that I hated.
Let me chase the ducks out front.
Let me sleep on her floor sometimes.
Made me Nolly.
Made me an awesome sunflower hat. (which is where I get my love for sunflowers)
My mom who I loved.
I believe I was in denial then, I was 4, happy, and confused.
I refused to let anyone do my hair.
I refused to let anyone to things my mom did.
I just wanted to sleep in her bed.
Believe she was coming home soon, but she wasn't.

I love my mom deeply, and believe she is an amazing strong woman, who fought for me and my family. I believe she helps me get through my toughest days.

Although she isn't here today she has helped make me who I am today.

-I can't believe it's been 12 years already.

The lifetime risk of getting melanoma is about 1 in 50 for whites, 1 in 1,000 for blacks, 1 in 200 for Hispanics.

The American Cancer Society estimates that in 2008 there will be 62,480 new cases of melanoma in this country. And about 8,420 people will die of this disease this year.

Accounts for about 75% of all skin cancer deaths.

To prevent Skin cancer:

-Wear a hat
-Use sunscreen and reapply every 2 hours as well as after swimming and sweating
-Do NOT tan, use sunless tanning lotion if you want the look of a tan
-Wear sunglasses
-Stay in the shade
-Avoid the sun and going outside between 10 am - 4 pm
To learn more visit www.cancer.org
To get involved visit www.RelayForLife.org
To get cute Pasty By Choice shirts or hats, or learn more about the Pasty By Choice campaign visit www.pastybychoice.com
To find out when and how you can get a free cancer screening visit www.skincancer.org

Healthy skin is beautiful skin!

AIA.

37.12 NONSCHOOL/CLUB PARTICIPATION

37.12.1 A student who is a member of a school Spiritline team shall not practice or compete with any other cheer/pom group, team, club, organization, association, etc., in that athletic-activity during the interscholastic season of competition. For purposes of this rule, the interscholastic season of competition shall begin with the first week of permissive football and concludes with the individual school’s last basketball game, including State competitions. Any student violating the above rule shall forfeit his/her eligibility for a minimum of the balance of the season for that athletic-activity or up to a maximum of one calendar year.

DETERMINATION: An individual student may take private lessons anytime except during the school day or during school practice sessions. Schools shall not pay for, arrange or in any way provide these individual private lessons. Individual private lessons shall not be used to circumvent or evade the nonschool/all-star participation rule and any such use of private lessons will be considered a violation of the nonschool/all-star participation rule. (Ex. Bd. 2/18/03) (This excludes competitive dance and gymnastics).

AND

· Spring Floors: To be used for tumbling skills only, no practicing jumps /stunts due to the different absorption between a spring floor and a conventional mat.


Position Statement Issues Presented by Mirja Campbell, Arizona Cheer Coaches Association



Why is there a bias for participation in outside cheerleading organizations? It is not justified that the AIA will allow Spiritline or Pom team member to do competitive gymnastics or dance, which have many of the same time and training demands of competitive cheer, but say that athletes doing cheerleading cannot. How can the AIA be justified to tell a Pom team member that they can be in competitive or studio dance but will tell a Cheerleader he or she cannot participate in club-cheerleading or other organizations nor that they can practice/train on a safer surface?

Why is there a rule being imposed that in fact LIMITS safer and better training opportunities for cheer athletes?

* Would the AIA soccer teams from training on turf if they have grass at their school?

* Would the AIA prohibit basketball teams from practicing on cement courts vs. basketball floor?
* Would the AIA prohibit tennis teams from practicing on clay or grass courts vs. hard courts?

Spiritline is a multi-season activity and this amendment creates an unreasonable bias simply because of the nature of this activity.

By not allowing high school team members to practice or compete with other organizations, this language also could impact:

* Pop Warner, Boys/Girls Club, rec league,
* high school cheerleaders who volunteer with cheer leagues or groups,
* church organizations with cheerleading ministries,
* cheerleading organizations that provide practice & performance opportunities,


So basically I can't do Varsity and All Stars, but a gymnast can do a school team and a gym team, a dancer can do a school team and be in a studio. How is this fair?

I can't believe they passed this, because it didn't pass last year.

Nolly Rocks.

Because Nolly Poly is my best friend.

My mom made her for me when I was little.
After the character in my favorite book was Nolly Poly Rabbit Tail and Me.
I wanted to get it every time we went to the library.
Even though I turned it in 2 seconds earlier.
I didn't get that, that's not what you were supposed to do.
Awhile after my mom past away, my dad bought me the book.
How glad I am that he did; I don't think they print it anymore.
And it's like impossible to find one, I would know I have tried.

After my Mom past away I also got chosen for this book contest thing at the library.
You had to explain what your favorite book was and why.
You had the opportunity to go on TV and talk about it.
I chickened out.
O'well.

I am grateful my Mom made Nolly for me.

Grr.

Nights like this I want to crawl in bed.
And sleep it off.
Messed up like everything I did today.
Not to mention I had like 5 plans and they ALL fell through.
Who wants to go from a fun filled planned night, to sitting in the other room hiding from grandma and grandpa.
Nights like this I am hurting from the way others treat me.
The way my friends act towards me.
The fact I can not focus.
I cry for no reason.
I just want to say grr you until tomorrow.
Soo GGGRR.